Okay, I’m going to try writing this honestly now. The first draft I wrote was a bit… fake. I tried to write it in a way that was positive and uplifting, but this is supposed to be an honest account of my journey through Asia filled with the ups and downs. So, here it goes. Honestly.
On New Year’s Eve one of my friends gave generously to me. I was jaw-dropped. Literally. I think there are still some fuzzies from the carpet stuck to my lip. Needless to say, I wasn’t expecting that at all. I expected something a lot smaller. And before you say, “You should be thankful for both big and small,” let me explain.
Yes, of course I’m thankful for both big and small offerings, but when you see someone sow so generously into your future it adds an abundance of unwavering hope.
When I looked at what was given to me I asked myself, Why? Why would she be so kind to me? So generous? Doesn’t she know how much I’ve doubted? How lacking my faith has been, that I’m literally scraping up what’s left in my reserves? That I’m still so bogged down by broken promises in my past? That I’m weighed down by things I could’ve done? That I’m literally beating up myself because I’m not as charismatic as that person? Obviously, I can’t raise a team of people to partner with me because I suck as a person.
This is the war in my mind.
But having received such a generous gift was like planting an atomic bomb on all of my fears and doubts. It awakened the dream I thought was put to rest.
Understand that giving is more than finances, it’s a seed of hope. You never know how much someone’s garden could use some more seeds of faith.
Thank you to all those who have given, both big and small gifts. YOU greatly encourage me to keep moving forward, even though the trail is muggy and the fog is thick. Thank you for traveling with me.
An Invitation to Sow Hope
If you would like to sow a seed into me and this journey to joy for China follow the link. You can make a monthly pledge or a one-time gift. Whatever it may be, thank you.